


The Trouble With Feeling

by Captain_Charlei



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-10
Updated: 2013-03-10
Packaged: 2017-12-04 21:28:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/715279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Captain_Charlei/pseuds/Captain_Charlei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even stubbornness can be worn down into nothing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Trouble With Feeling

Dean slumped against the back of the door, eyes open but barely seeing. His keys were tossed to the counter, hitting the old stained linoleum with a metallic sort of slap. He pushed himself away from the cracked wood of the motel room door and walked towards the bed.

He found himself staring absent-mindedly at the wall, sitting on the creaky mattress for hours. The sun rose outside, shining the morning through the tangled shades. His eyes closed slowly, and he let out a shaky breath.

His cellphone was in his hands shortly after. He sat there looking at it, moving it from one hand to the other. The plastic felt alien against his palms, it served as nothing more than a reminder to why he was even here. 

Dean Winchester had nothing. He was nothing. He had given all of him out, his body, his blood, his heart, even his soul. So there he was, with nothing left but his stubbornness.

But even that was wearing thin.

He was tired. Tired of life breaking him down again and again. Tired of having to live with nothing but emptiness. Tired of watching himself fall apart piece by piece every time he looked in the mirror. The only thing that had kept him in this world, the only thing, was his family.

Look where that had gotten him. Alone, empty, and sitting in a dirty motel room with a gun in his hands. Not only thinking, but knowing he’d rather be back in hell than stay here.

Absently he mused over whether or not Sam would ever find out, but laughed and pushed the thought aside. Sam may have known him better than anyone, but he wasn’t even his brother anymore. Sammy was gone.

Cool metal pressed against his lips and slipped past them. He felt himself smile around the barrel. Seemed fitting, he supposed, the thing only had one bullet left.

Dean Winchester had always been stubborn, and it had been that stubbornness that kept him alive. But, now, he couldn’t be bothered with his pride. He couldn’t be bothered with anything. Something inside of him crumbled with relief when he realized he was only one movement away from ending it.

The gun fired, and there was nothing.

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt from a lovely anon on tumblr, who wanted some serious angst that was set in around season 4-5ish. 
> 
> So. 
> 
> I fed them angst.


End file.
